I had to earn my food. In an irrational way, it is an expression of my internalization that I am unworthy. Thus, I must earn worthiness. I internalize my desperation for value and worth by working to be perfect. As a result, I also worked to perfect my diet, health, and body in the name of “health.” However, to get to my goals, I had to restrict more and more…ur worth as an individual person does not depend on what you do or do not eat, or how you do or do not move your body. You are perfect right here, right now.